Why Lying to your partner cannot hide the truth

It hurts to find out your partner lied to you on something they didn’t have to lie about in the name of “the fear of losing you”. It is understandable when a couple is already in a committed relationship or marriage, although it is not the right thing to do.

But people with no relationship do that. You just meet them and start talking to them. They lie with the fear of rejection. They lie because they are afraid the person they are interested in might not accept them.

They lie about their age, because of the fear that, if the partner knows their real age, they might not agree to be in a relationship with them. But what they don’t know is that, to some people, age is just a number when they like you. What they focus on is your maturity.

Some people lie about their academic qualifications with the fear that the person they are interested in might look down on them and reject them, but that is not always true. People who genuinely like you see potential in you, not your certification or academic qualification.

Others would lie about their previous relationship and children. One thing they don’t know is that, people who like you don’t focus on your past relationship or Exes. They are willing to accept you and your child from a previous relationship so there is no need to lie.

Lying from the beginning of a relationship with the intention of revealing the truth once your partner falls in love with you, is committed to you or marries you, is like building a great relationship to where you desire, only to destroy it. You cannot hide a piece of you from someone you want to be one with. You cannot keep secrets from them for life. They will get to know and once they do, that is when trust is broken.

Relationship is nothing without trust. Lying to them makes them feel you are not worth trusting. You are not worth being with. It also makes them feel betrayed, led on, manipulated, taken advantage of.

Your partner finds it difficult to trust. They doubt you, see the whole relationship as a lie, for you are not who you claimed to be. It is better to start your relationship on a clean sheet. Be honest, start as a friend, that gives you confidence to speak to them about everything as much as possible without the fear of being rejected.

In conclusion, “People want a friend they can trust. It is better to be poor than to be a liar.” – Proverbs 19:22 (ERV).

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