In every relationship, there comes a moment when the fire goes out a bit, and things start to feel very routine. Those butterflies can’t keep fluttering in your stomach forever, and those rose-colored glasses will really come off at some point.
Of course, that doesn’t mean that you should end the relationship, as it is entirely normal.
If you land on planet earth again, you will have to work a little harder here and there to stay in love with your partner.
Fortunately, there are tricks.
1. Go back to the beginning
Tell each other what you thought when you first saw each other. What did you like about the other person? Why did you fall in love? What traits did you find so smashing back then? The dimples in the cheeks? The infectious laugh?
Chances are you still see some of that now. Focus on that.
2. Look with new eyes
How would you look at the other person if you were on a blind date with them right now? Do that! Look very consciously at your partner at a party. See how gallant he is, with how much passion he talks about something? Keep those new sparks coming! Or watch your partner in a different role – for example, if he has to give a presentation.
3. Be grateful
When habits take over in a relationship, you can take the sweet things your partner does for you for granted. And even if you do notice them, do you still show your gratitude? So write your partner a note thanking him for always taking out the trash, cleaning the windows, or giving you an incredible massage after a long day.
4. Surprise each other
To relive the feeling of being in love again, it is important to find things that trigger this feeling. You can evoke this feeling of love by occasionally surprising each other. For example, you can ‘kidnap’ each other to someone’s favorite restaurant or plan a surprise weekend away. You can, of course, prepare your partner’s favorite dish as a surprise. It doesn’t have to be big; it’s about the surprise and, therefore, about the gesture.
5. Flirt with each other
Feeling happy in a long-term relationship includes feeling that someone will always be there for you. No matter what happens, you know someone is there to catch you. But at the same time, we also need tension and mysticism. The challenge is to have both things with one person. And to do this, you can keep flirting with each other like you did when you first met. So send an exciting text message to your loved one (however weird this feels the first time), tease each other or show a little more affection.
